Functional testing meets real life solutions. Because you’re looking for information, not another juice cleanse.

Ever had 'normal' labs from your doctor but still feel like garbage? That's because standard labs only tell part of the story. Functional testing digs deeper, looking at how your body's actually working & who’s living with you friends and frenemies - not just whether you're 'normal' or not. It's like getting the director's cut instead of the trailer.

Sick of throwing supplements at your gut issues and hoping something sticks? Done with wellness influencers telling you to just drink celery juice? Ready to actually understand what the f*ck is going on in there?

Let's Get Real About Your Gut Health (With Data, Not Random Protocols)

THE TOTAL REBELLION featuring the GI MAP™ test (cue Rocky montage)

Here's the deal: Instead of guessing what's up with your gut or following another random elimination diet, we use a comprehensive at-home stool test to see what's actually going on in there. Because knowing beats guessing every time.

What you get:

  • GI MAP™ Stool Test (it's easy, I promise)

  • Virtual "Let's Decode This Sh*t" Session

  • Custom Protocol That Actually Fits Your Life

Notes about GI MAP™ testing:

Real talk about testing costs: You'll get direct access to order your GI MAP™ test through my client portal. I believe in total transparency - you'll pay the exact USD price that the testing company charges, with zero markup from me. I get it, testing is expensive but it provides us with real data as to what’s going on. The lab ships directly to your door, keeping it simple and straightforward.

Remember functional testing isn’t diagnosing what’s going on for you. It’s a tool to provide information to better curate your program & measure your progress!

Start Your Rebellion

Real solutions for rebellious humans who are done with BS wellness culture.